Breaking News: County Board offers olive branch to Eire Og following complaints arising from championship 2017

The Wicklow GAA County board has made the first step in resolving the recent dispute with Eire Og GAA in the hopes of having the Greystones club’s players available for selection over the coming months. It was well documented that Eire Og had major issues with how the championship was run in County Wicklow last year with even medical staff weighing in with their problems. Doctor Meredith Greystones commented “to ask players to put their bodies on show in that condition was absolute lunacy. These young men have worked hard all year. They have the right to be given the opportunity to put on the best performance they possibly can on the day. Even one hour without the availability of appropriate tanning facilities can result in severe damage to those wonderfully bronzed legs ”.

In support of their team doctors comments, several Eire Og players also released statements of support on the condition that they renamed anonymous. An understandable request as the players were all visibly pale as a direct result of their difficulties this season.

How are we meant to play football in front of large crowds in the knowledge that our legs are as pale as an umpires coat, it’s not right. How can I even think about giving my trademark Blue Steel Look to my adoring fans in the stand when I’m looking like an eskimos arse. You guys in the County Board are like total frickin douchebags!

Having rejected a request from Eire Og to have state of the art tanning facilities installed in all championship grounds, the county board has extended the offer of a mud bath to as many teams as possible at all championship grounds. At the time of going to press, the Eire Og management teams and panels have opted to retreat to their tanning and waxing studios in Costa Del Greystones to consider this proposal.