1. Which teammates sibling would you swipe right on Tinder for and why?
I’m not spoilt with choice being honest but defo Ken Murphy’s sister, he only moved to Newcastle a couple of years ago but was always very reluctant to introduce me to her, I don’t no why, I’m a nice lad.
2. What teammate do you think believes they have the best chance of a modelling career?
Oisin (chin) doyle. Hes one of them lads who would wear fancy white football boots on a gaelic pitch. I have no respect or time for lads like that.
3. The most embarrassing thing to happen to you in your time with the club?
Has to be the rumour frank magee started a few years back that me and Wayne Rooney go to the same barbers for a haircut. He just doesn’t believe that my hairline changed its mind after a while and started to go forward, not back.
4. What club do you most enjoy playing against and why?
Has to be that club 5 mins out the road Kilcoole, the hatred and rivalry goes back to the school days, eat, sleep, drink and hate Kilcoole. But always good hard games. The arguments tend to be forgotten after the game. (most of the time)
5. Favourite moment playing for your club?
Championship semi final against Ballinacor a few years ago, last minute goal by Rob O Gara with 30 seconds to go. Rob O Gara was a good laugh back then, he’s a broken man now, a changed man, very mature, has a kid now, a misses, a dog and a mortgage. What the f*ck was he thinking.
6. Should pineapples be on Pizzas?
I have always ate pinapple on a pizza and thought it was grand but as Shane Magee always says “I’ve ate a lot worse”. I wonder what he means.
7. Which player would you trust with your sister and why?
There isnt many, there is some sick twisted lads on that Newcastle team, from the mould of Joesph Fritzel but I’d go with Sean Ryder, no woman can find a man with so much body hair attractive. Its gone well beyond a gillette fusion razor for that body, more in need of a hedge trimmers.
8. Which player would you not trust with your sister and why?
A toss up, Neil Yeoman or Shane Magee. I’d probably say Shane Magee because i know what that lads like after a few drinks, if that lads bed could talk it would tell some seriously sick stories.
9. Who was the toughest player you ever marked?
The boys up in Knockananna, they would break their own mothers neck with a tackle if it ment them winning a ball. But I always remember an intermediate league game against Baltinglass a few years back. I think Rory Nolan was his name. I always remember the name of the c*nt that didnt even have the decency to put on some lube before riding me that day.
10. What club in Wicklow would you have liked to play for if you weren’t a proud Newcastle man and why?
I’d have to say Rathnew, even though they forgot to drop me down my transfers papers when they were dropping down Adam Merriman’s a few years back. But any team where I’d get a well deserved smack at Conor Ffrench. He’s another lad who wears those fancy white boots on a gaelic field. Would make ya sick.